Opportunities bring change. Change is good.

        I feel like I didn't take advantage of all that high school had to offer me. I thought I had a plan for my life, so I took classes focusing on that as well as getting as much college credit as possible. It was GREAT and all, and I'm really happy I have so many credits done, but I could have had a lot more fun at Davis. It's such a huge school, and there was always the ridiculous Northend/Southend divide that probably held a lot of people back from becoming friends. It's been interesting to see how paths of these people that supposedly hated each other in high school have crossed since graduating.
        The thing I've noticed is that everything changed SO quickly. New high school graduates were leaving on missions or flying off to school within days. The whole missionary thing didn't hit me until about 2 weeks ago. My good friend Bryce had his farewell, and I struggled a lot for some reason. I don't think I was all that upset just because he was leaving, but more because the abrupt "goodbye" finally became real. I realized that half of my friends were already gone or were soon to be gone for 2 years. Just like everyone says, you don't talk to everyone once high school is over. I've already had friendships hit the rocks. Personalities clash or time to chill just doesn't match up which has been hard as well.
       Do you get my point that a lot of things have CHANGED? That's what I'm trying to get across. But the thing is, I'm so happy with life right now. Heavenly Father has put opportunities in front of me that I never would have dreamed of happening. Actually, I have dreamed about it, but never thought it would happen. I've been working most of my time this summer as a receptionist for BMI. I work with my dad, my brothers, a family friend who likes to talk a lot, and a bunch of middle aged men. Most of the time it's not that exciting of a job, but there's always stuff to do so I feel like I'm contributing to the company. Today I was sitting at my desk scanning stuff and overheard 4 of the guys doing the "I walked to school and back uphill both ways," thing trying to convince the others that they had worse living conditions on their missions. It was hilarious, and because of little things like that I enjoy where I work. On the side I work as an intern at X96 with their promotions director. I have learned so much in the time I've been with X. In the words of radio DJ Jon Smith himself, "To be good at this job, you just have to be able to talk to people. If you can have a conversation with a stranger you're set." He's a wise guy when he's not having a fist fight with an angry bee. (hahaha) But really, I've grown such a greater understanding of people through this internship. From short conversations trying to get people pumped about events coming up to long conversations while driving from location to location. You can get to know someone so quickly if you just listen. I'm grateful for that, and for the friendships that I've made with both of my jobs. I've come to know some of the most caring people I've ever met, and am grateful for their examples to me about unselfishness and hard work.
         Because of the changes that have happened, I've seen myself grow. I'm actually a lot more motivated! Motivated to earn money for school, to learn as much as I can at X, to actually finish my Personal Progress before I turn 19, to read my scriptures every day (thank you Bro. Vasas), and to be successful. Heavenly Father has given so much, and I probably took advantage of that in high school. Actually, I DID take advantage of that in high school. I want to do all I can to show my appreciation for all I've been given. Cody is in his last stretch of his mission, and he just wants to work so badly. I can tell from his letters how eager he is to serve our Heavenly Father. That is another great example in my life, and I can't wait until Code's home and down in Provo with me.
        I don't know if this post has been super random or jumpy, I'm not a writer that's for sure, but I'm just really grateful for my family and the people I'm surrounded by. The changes going on in life right now are crazy, but exciting. I'm going to try and keep my attitude of learning from change as I move down to BYU and experience probably the most I ever have. We had a really touching lesson on Faith in Relief Society a few weeks back that strengthened my own testimony that we are only given things to help us progress and to grow. Opportunities bring change, and change is good.
       

THANKS.

My friend Nekel just inspired me to write about what I'm thankful for... Cause there's a whole lot of things right now! I'm one of those people that as soon as Halloween is over I listen to the N'SYNC Christmas album daily, which even though I listen to it year round I guess it's still considered Christmas music? Who knows. But back to my point! I don't really pay much attention to what Thanksgiving is all about. FOOD. Yes, but no. THANKS GIVING. Heavenly Father has given me so many things I should appreciate more than I really do. So for the rest of this month, and next, I'm going to do my best to recognize these things.

Today I am grateful for...

• Fleetwood Mac
• People that come visit me at work
• Exercise
• The sound of Athletic Tape tearing
• Earrings
• Smiley faces in texts :)
• Pictures of my nieces and nephews in my family room
• A hard working dad who's away on business. I don't give him enough credit for what he does.
• Tailgates on trucks
• Pennies
• The fact that the Christmas dance is in a month. I'm SO excited.
• The sunset
• Oranges
• Sitting at a stop light when it's dark outside

I have just been REAL happy the past two weeks. There are quite a few things that have contributed to this, but they all have made me be ME. I really feel like I have been Courtney for the first time in a long time. Being who I want to be and having fun with the people around me. I mean, there are still things that I'm not a fan of that make me frustrated and mad and stressed out. But heck. We're supposed to go through things like that. Errrrything that happens happens for a reason. Even if we go months and months... and months without knowing why, there will be that day when it makes sense and you're grateful for it. It happens! Life is just... It's just nice.

One of THOSE Nights

HI. I made a blog. And I feel weird that this is my very first post, but it's what I'm feeling. So here!

Tonight's been a rough night. I went to the Davis game and just felt like an outsider. I don't even know why! Maybe it's because everyone's talking about Homecoming and such? Or maybe because I've just been stuck on the fact that I'm almost 17 and still haven't gone on a date yet?There are a lot of things it could be. I just want to fast-forward time!

So I go home after the game... and watch Boy Meets World and Say Yes to the Dress. NOT A GOOD CHOICE WHEN YOU'RE IN THIS MOOD. It just made me sad! First of al, Corey and Topanga! Why do they have to be so cute?! Then.. there was the cutest couple ever looking for a dress. You could tell how much they cared about eachother by the way they looked at eachother. AND. He was a cowboy. That just pushed me over the edge. All I want is a nice cowboy who cares about me and shows it! (Oh look. A commercial with that couple just came on tv again... Thanks.) I'm just having a girl night. Wanting to have a guy that would do anything for you to be happy. I know that being married doesn't mean life is all dandy after you say "I Do." I just look at it as you always having a best friend there for you. He's there when you're at your highest AND your lowest. I don't know, maybe I think about this too often?

What shall I do to feel better? Go get Willy and sing the song I wrote the last time I was in this mood. YEAH, I wrote a song when I was mad about guy(s). It makes me REAL emotional sometimes when I sing it. But, it makes me feel like T-Swift and that all on it's own just makes me feel better. :)